Chapter 14 New Zealand South Island  

AI Generated 

Set in wintertime, this was a cold adventure setting — out of the frying pan and straight into the ice-cold chiller. The usual fanfare of dramatic landscapes and natural beauty was still there, but it was intertwined with the reality of being an out-of-season backpacker. The simple comforts of fan heaters, puzzles, and warm indoor evenings became part of the experience, while the harsh conditions added another layer of challenge to exploring the country. 

The Working Holiday Visa was a different set-up compared with Downunder. The Kiwis appeared to have stricter criteria when it came to hiring backpackers, and the currency was a bit of a bummer to start with. It was a different rhythm of travel, requiring more patience, adaptability, and persistence. 

I became the typical tourist, exploring cities marked on the map and documenting them in detail. I developed an unexpected affinity for Invercargill, visited free museums, and had the privilege of seeing a real-life tuatara — one of those moments that reminds you why travelling somewhere unfamiliar is worthwhile. 

Years have passed, gradually turning into decades, yet it remains a memorable chapter filled with moments that continue to creep into everyday life. This led to some nostalgic research on Google Maps, chasing the ghost of a memory that still lingered. Eventually, I found what I was looking for: two random residential houses and a backpacker hostel named after a brand of whisky. 

One of the most euphoric experiences was tramping around Stewart Island. It brought a deeper realisation of the responsibility that comes with exploring remote environments. Camping in isolated huts was not just about enjoying the wilderness; it was about respecting it. Lighting fires responsibly, clearing up after yourself, and leaving the place ready for the next traveller became part of the unwritten code. 

By good fortune, he and five other backpackers travelled to Milford Sound, all from different nationalities and backgrounds. The usual mixture of personalities and minor confrontations came along for the ride — nothing unusual, just people doing their own thing. Once the official documents were signed for insurance purposes, they were quickly forgotten after being dropped off into the adventure. 

Some of the reference books I have read since then shed light on human arrogance and the recurring patterns of human behaviour. They explore how people ignore core issues while trying to maintain the peace or justify questionable decisions — whether it is reaching the summit of Mount Everest at any cost, holidaying in areas where forest fires are raging, or abandoning society altogether in search of isolation and ultimately facing tragic consequences. 

As usual, I drift into one of my Granddad moments — wrestling with thoughts about home life, trying to piece together how the world works, and imagining ways to put it right. I reflect on global events, the things left unsaid, and the possible cover-ups surrounding them. At the same time, I think back to group dynamics and the strange human instinct to justify yourself in front of the wrong audience. 

Chapter 15 Thailand first time.  

AI Generated 

Was I ever going to regret doing the WHV in Oz before landing in exotic Siam, where the exchange rate was ฿65 to the UK £1? No effing way! 

Beyond the excitement of being a tourist and allowing the elements to guide the journey, a Malaysian companion shared a large part of this adventure. Along the way, the chapter explores some of the controversial subjects we often overlook: the origins and persistence of antisemitism, the influence of bias, personal opinions, and money, and the uncomfortable reality that even multicultural societies like the UK still carry these issues within their communities. 

Documented are the ventures through the cities and places visited, including the Burmese Railway, along with the unforgettable bar scenes and tourist learning experiences such as Thai massage. There are also warnings about being aware of your surroundings, as unfamiliar environments can bring unexpected consequences, including situations that may put your safety and even your life at risk in another country. 

The chapter also offers future travelling insights into why certain countries become restricted or avoided by travellers, and how media-driven fear can sometimes leave ordinary citizens with an enquiring mind feeling frustrated. It introduces one local citizen who is unhappy with the direction his country is taking, while also exploring the misconception that Western travellers with money should assume they are irresistible to Asian women. I’m sure you understand the story. 

This is a packed chapter that explores neurodivergence and learning disabilities, showing how people can experience the world through their own unique lens and the ways they adapt along the way. It highlights different approaches to learning, taking notes, and building social relationships beyond the classroom. 

The journey also brings encounters with an ex-backpacker from Coles and another person from my own village of Whittlesey, UK, who had created a life for himself overseas. Alongside this are revelations about characters from the school I might have attended if I had been neurotypical. 

The chapter ends in a truly sickening form. 

Chapter 16 Between Travels   

AI Generated 

After a sudden illness that Uk authorities considered life-threatening, I found myself lying in bed, reflecting on my own mortality. In those quiet moments, I began to take life more seriously and awakened to the reality that my time on this blue planet was limited. 

This chapter follows a two-year journey of rebuilding myself and transitioning back into society. It was a return to a world of responsibilities — becoming, in many ways, an obedient “debt slave” once again, returning to work as a lifeguard, and learning how people’s perceptions of me had changed. The way people viewed my past was not always the way they interacted with me in the present. 

As the days passed, I slowly began clawing my way back financially, searching for the identity I had left behind in the Land of Smiles. I committed myself to every internal training opportunity offered by the company and invested in rebuilding my skills and confidence. Eventually, I achieved my Personal Training qualification under the City & Guilds Exercise and Fitness framework, marking another step towards reclaiming my purpose. 

The journey was a long game. However, over time I found myself becoming stagnant again, partly because I had not pursued better career opportunities elsewhere. This lack of progression affected other areas of my life, including my confidence and the way I believed I was perceived in relationships. 

Along the way, I learned valuable lessons about human psychology, professional conduct, and the importance of understanding how others see us. In any environment, whether personal or professional, presentation, communication, and self-awareness play a crucial role. 

This chapter is ultimately about survival, adaptation, and rediscovering oneself after being forced to confront the possibility of losing everything. It is about rebuilding from the ground up and preparing for whatever opportunity or transformation comes next. 

Chapter 17 Bangkok 2nd Time 

AI Generated 

Returning to where I had last set off, I made my way back to CBG using public transport, without notifying my hosts beforehand. Despite the unexpected arrival, they welcomed me with genuine personal hospitality. It reminded me that human connections can leave a lasting impression, often beyond what we anticipate. 

This time, I chose a different approach. Rather than focusing on the tourist attractions they wanted to show me, I sought to understand the city’s culture by joining a Tai Chi club. Through early morning lessons, I began building relationships with the group and experienced a different kind of hospitality — one rooted in community, routine, and social bonds. 

It was there that I started to notice the subtle divides between the Chinese and Thai communities. Although they often interacted and shared spaces, there remained a preference for maintaining their own cultural circles. 

Eventually, I explored Thai massage, which brought mixed experiences with different tutors, and I met a palm reader who claimed to be psychic. Their ability to immediately pick up details about my life felt striking, and they demonstrated similar accuracy when reading another Asian woman’s palm. 

This became a quieter chapter of the journey, one that also marked my first steps into exploring the English teaching profession and the possibilities it offered. 

Chapter 18 Chumphon 

Ai Generated 

A journey through Thailand by railway, combined with the experience of living cheaply and simply, brought a welcome break from my old routine. Life slowed down dramatically — almost to a snail’s pace — and it taught me the true value of taking time away from the modern Western lifestyle. I realised that two weeks of holiday often isn’t enough to truly recover from a way of living that can leave you feeling completely drained. 

I took to a moped and explored the surrounding province, discovering quiet places of seclusion and beauty. Among them were visits to Ban Mu Thot and Pitsadan Cave, where an unexpected spiritual experience left me both amazed and unsettled. Along the way, there was also a strange encounter with a local who lost his temper with himself after a moment of carelessness. 

These moments, along with many others, became part of a small but unforgettable chapter of my journey — one filled with slower living, unexpected encounters, and lessons that stayed with me long after I left. 

Chapter 19 Kao Toa  

AI Generated 

The cheesy layout of the carpets, the catering towards the Farang during the Christmas period, and the overwhelming volume of tourists reminded me of overindulging in a feast. The vile terminology used to describe these creatures, along with the overdevelopment of the island, painted a certain picture. But that’s not what this is about. 

This chapter highlights the differences between the learning styles of NTs and NDs. How they can be on the same course, learning the same syllabus in parallel with one another, yet experience it in completely different ways. This time, however, the classroom is underwater, with cylinders, dive watches, and those horrific multiple-choice questions we all love and hate — especially when they receive a bad reputation at my end. 

I make progress with my social skills through a mixture of observation and the obvious. I begin to fantasise about the Moon Party scene, perhaps influenced by a moment from the film The Beach, written by Alex Garland. The rest is all good. 

Chapter 20 Ko Pha Ngan 

Ai Generated 

Paying respect to the power and mystery of the sea, I began to envision taking a sailing course where the horizons were boundless and the dangers were real. 

Arriving on Ko Pha Ngan felt strangely ordinary — almost like stepping onto a London Underground platform — only this time surrounded by the familiar rhythms of a beach island lifestyle aimed at tourists in their late teens and twenties. 

Despite having the freedom of a moped and the ability to explore, the place never felt entirely welcoming. Perhaps it was connected to a sense of imbalance: the contrast between the opportunities available to Western visitors and those available to many local Thai people. 

It was a place where, despite the famous moon parties and constant activity, I sometimes felt I had more in common with the stray animals and insects than with the people around me. 

At 34, perhaps it was a place I had already outgrown. The atmosphere seemed designed for a different kind of traveller.  

Looking back, I documented some thoughts about female hypergamy, which reflected how I interpreted certain experiences at the time, though it does not represent the overall way I view relationships or people today. 

I deeply longed to return to Koh Tao and reconnect with the dive crew. Leaving them felt like leaving a part of myself behind. 

Separated from that sense of belonging, I began my own journey again, but it led me into a period of depression. Christmas Day was especially difficult for some reason. I was living what had once been a dream from years before, yet there was an unhappiness hidden beneath the postcard scenery. Perhaps many people can relate to that feeling of looking at an ideal situation and still finding themselves feeling lost. 

On a brighter note, the next chapter will be much more sociable. 

Chapter 21 Back to Kao Toa 

AI Generated  

A centipede bite in Squamish became the unexpected beginning of many events that followed. Later, over an English breakfast in Koh Tao, internal conversations about the decline of the United Kingdom unfolded — touching on government, Labour, Gordon Brown’s policies, and ideas surrounding a changing world order. 

Looking back, those events and experiences helped shape the way I view today’s society. I sometimes wonder how figures from history, even someone like Hitler, might have interpreted the world if they had witnessed these changes — although I want to make clear that I do not support or express antisemitism in any form. 

Much of this journey has been about understanding myself and trying to piece together where I fit within society. It led me to reflect on workplace culture back home and the difficulties people can face, including the possibility that a career may be affected when personal relationships and family circumstances change, such as when a single mother chooses to enter a long-term partnership. 

Island life brought its own challenges and ambitions. Wanting to progress through the PADI qualification ladder opened the door to new experiences, but it also brought moments where I came close to never sharing this story. 

There were times involving heavy drinking, uncomfortable encounters — including feeling watched by a local person in Koh Samui — and conversations with older individuals warning younger people about the dangers that exist, including situations where tempting offers can be difficult to ignore. 

These experiences, both positive and troubling, became pieces of a much larger story about identity, society, and finding a place in the world. 

Chapter 22 Ferry crossing and visa renewal  

AI Generated 

It’s a frustrating experience when you feel you are not being heard or taken seriously. Many men can relate to this feeling in their interactions with the opposite sex. Perhaps a trip to renew my visa at the Myanmar border may be part of the solution, exposing me to the bureaucratic challenges that innocent travellers, like myself, are often subjected to. In some ways, the experience felt like being treated in a discriminatory manner. 

Seeing in the New Year was a sickening experience, and I ended up stuck in Chumphon with a common cold that took time to disappear. On the other hand, the staff at the guesthouse were genuinely pleased to see me, despite the small flashpoint of losing the moped fuel cap. In essence, it was a hot-and-cold relationship — I found myself moving between being on their good side and their bad side, depending on the circumstances and everyone’s temperaments. 

The journey continues to bring contradictions to my mind. My time alone leads me to reflect on how neurotypical people relate to themselves and others, and how they form bonds within companies and social structures until changes in dynamics eventually reshape those relationships. 

I have highlighted my own battle and the most effective weapons I have chosen to navigate it: a spreadsheet, a diary, and a master plan, all while heading by train towards Bangkok. 

Chapter 23  Bangkok Cosy Guesthouse 

Ai Generated 

Despite coming to terms with the workplace dilemma that had continued to anger me for over a decade — particularly the favouritism I had witnessed — I found myself settling into the routines and conformities of the city. I wasn’t doing much beyond updating my CV, attending free aerobics classes, and finally beginning to let go of the obsessive pursuit of new course material that would have cost me thousands of pounds if I had continued. Even completing the TEFL qualification, something I had once been determined to finish, no longer seemed worthwhile. 

I wanted something different, and I began imagining myself learning Muay Thai at a school. Aside from immersing myself in the city, there was not much else to report. I encountered stories of a fellow traveller who was financially supporting his Russian girlfriend, effectively bankrolling their lifestyle until he was going broke and emotionally breaking down — a situation that reminded me of similar experiences I had witnessed through a workcolleague back in the UK. 

There was also the story of an American tourist whose mother was rumoured to have flown to Bangkok in an attempt to stop her from travelling to the Myanmar border for a visa renewal. 

Chapter 24  Resumed Bangkok  

AI Generated 

Shopping malls and cities around the world can quietly influence our emotions and leave us feeling disconnected, even unhappy, without us fully understanding why. MBK in Bangkok is an example of how humans appear beneath artificial shop lighting and commercial environments, where our ancient instincts for comparison, judgement, and survival are triggered in modern surroundings. 

Although society often conditions us not to openly acknowledge these reactions, they remain part of human behaviour. This chapter explores that uncomfortable reality: the ugliness of consumerism and the way it affects both men and women. In particular, it examines female behaviour, appearance pressures, and the broader issue of body fascism that impacts all genders. 

It is a difficult chapter about modern hardship — the endless pursuit of “keeping up with the Joneses,” the exhaustion caused by consumer culture, and the feeling of having one’s energy drained by a system built around constant competition. It also highlights the importance of mental health and financial stability in a world where many people feel they are operating at zero percent. 

The discussion expands to the skyscrapers of Bangkok, the competitiveness of global cities, and the ways different countries are responding to increasing populations through both positive and negative approaches. 

This is a chapter that deliberately moves off course before finding its way back to the centre. It explores possibilities for the future: backpacking missions beyond Earth, opportunities for people with engineering backgrounds, working-holiday concepts adapted for older generations, and perhaps, one day, journeys to Mars. 

Sooner rather than later, humanity may find itself exploring new frontiers — not only across countries, but across planets. 

Chapter 25 Chaing Mai 2nd time 

Ai Generated 

Muay Thai training, including the initial introduction, can carry risks for those who arrive unprepared, without prior fitness knowledge or adequate training. There are documented cases of tourists suffering injuries when they accept excessive praise or encouragement without understanding their own limits. 

This chapter explores the contradictions behind that kind of encouragement — when motivation crosses into false reassurance. It examines the psychological impact of being told you are exceptional while also experiencing uncomfortable social dynamics, including moments involving attitudes that may feel discriminatory or unsettling. 

Muay Thai was demanding, and parts of the training experience are documented in detail. The chapter follows the challenges faced inside the gym, the physical and mental pressures of training, and the usual interactions and personalities of other travellers who took part in the programme. 

Also included are observations about a newly built apartment, insights into Thai and foreign business ownership, and the restrictions foreigners face when it comes to technically owning property in Thailand, in brief. 

The chapter also covers the frustrations of repairs taking place while trying to recover and rest after training, along with memories from a previous visit, a Thai barbecue experience, and reminders about protecting important legal documents while travelling. 

Towards the end are reflections on dreams and past struggles with the conscious mind, including one unusual idea: imagining life lived in reverse — beginning in a nursing home and moving backwards through adulthood, childhood, and finally infancy. 

Chapter 26 Pai 

Ai Generated 

Pai was the place to go and reacquaint himself with Mr Belgium, the character described in the previous book. Sometimes, the person who dislikes you can become the very person whose roots you want to trace and understand. 

The scenery was tranquil, with its oases, bars, wanderers, Buddhism, and relaxed atmosphere. Yet the charm was gradually spoiled by the presence of a drug culture that had taken hold in small community spaces. 

During the day, Pai seemed to sleep, only coming alive at night when the hippie culture was in full swing. The New Age movement of peace and light blended with the Rastafarian influence of reggae music drifting from speakers inside cafés filled with board games, magic sets, and pool tables. 

However, it was becoming ordinary, and I began to lose the momentum and sense of adventure that came with backpacking through the free world. 

Not all was lost. There appeared to be a kind of fugitive hideout for those wishing to remain beneath the radar. One resident opened up after being questioned about his troubled life, revealing unimaginable traumas he had experienced, including encounters involving Interpol and claims of being watched or monitored. 

It was a reminder that neurodivergent minds, like his own, sometimes need to be careful not to let curiosity become an intrusion into the private lives of others. 

Chapter 27 The Ending of Thailand 

Ai Generated 

The irony of earthquakes pursuing my tail like an FBI agent — was it merely coincidence, or was it something else? After arriving in Bangkok to unseasonably cold weather, I made my way back to CBG and changed my ticket to New Zealand. 

I decided to try my luck with a lone female backpacker from the UK who wasn’t having the best start to her trip. I acted under false pretenses, using the gravity of her situation to my advantage. Looking back, it made what I had written about female nature in the Ko Pha Ngan chapter seem somewhat accurate. 

Along the way, I had the pleasure of meeting some fascinating people, including the band Gober Gun and the head of the Astronomy Association of Congo. Before long, two Kiwi backpackers arriving from Auckland gave me their accurate verdict: it was time to head off to the Land of the Long White Cloud. 

Chapter 28 New Zealand 

Ai Generated 

More expensive than before, and already feeling strained from being on the road for too long, I arrived in a place that greeted me with a mixture of attitudes, tour operators, and endless rules and regulations displayed everywhere I looked. 

The stories I tell may read like the accounts of a marine who has endured too much combat — someone carrying the weight of experiences that never fully leave them. By the time the reader reaches this point in my manuscript, they may begin to feel that same exhaustion and emotional fatigue. Much of the journey resembles that of a travelling minstrel, moving from place to place, performing the expected routines while quietly carrying a deep sense of homesickness. 

What lies ahead are scenes of volcanic landscapes, dramatic encounters, and an unlikely ice-cream and spaghetti bolognese connection that transforms from a honeymoon-like experience into a devastating domestic crisis within 24 hours. There are also reflections and warnings drawn from my own experiences about relationships, trust, and the risks of becoming trapped in situations that are difficult to escape. 

The person involved shared stories of family struggles, blame, and personal suffering, including the impact of a serious illness affecting her sister. Trying to understand those circumstances became part of a much larger and more complicated emotional journey. 

This is a long and intense chapter, filled with psychological wounds and experiences that have affected my ability to enter future relationships with the same openness and trust as before. 

There are also future projects planned that will bring these two stories fully to life once they reach publication.